A scene from a recent production of Robert’s SUBJECT TO FITS at the Alley Theatre in Houston, Texas
As a playwright whose work has been produced throughout the world for over 40 years, and an Ivy League professor of scriptwriting, Robert is particularly skilled in writing and doctoring video scripts of all kinds, from training videos to presentations. He is fully at home with the collaboration involved, and a pro at making scripts more pointed, natural and memorable. He is particularly adept at giving a conversational flow to exposition, information and message.
Below is a sample from Robert’s doctoring of a corporate video that received the following testimonial:
“Thank you, Bob, for adding such artful touches throughout. It’s great to be edited by a very talented writer/editor!”
Paul Rupert, President, Rupert & Company
ORIGINAL DRAFT OF A CORPORATE VIDEO SCRIPT:
[David is seated at the conference room table. Maria at the door.]
David: Hey, Maria. I thought you worked from home on Wednesdays.
Maria: Usually, but not today. In for a big meeting – then up for a challenge., Go any?
David: Well, I’m your guy. I’m fried. I’ve got to trademy monster commute for some saner telecommuting. Can you guide me through this flex proposal? Clearly you know the drill.
Maria: Now that would be a challenge – and fun. I just have to teach you to do what I did: read the flex proposal form, think hard and creatively about the questions and don’t give up until you’ve got a lot of winning answers. The ultimate winners, the key customers need to be you and the company. Do you have a few minutes to get started?
David: More than a few. I even know exactly what I want: telecommuting two days a week. I’d still work full time, but wipe out almost half my commute. It sounds great for me – but not so much for the company. And I keep getting to this same stuck place: “Good for me, bad for the business.”
Maria:[?] I can’t get past the scene of my empty desk and my frustrated manager and coworkers constantly looking for me. I’ll work as hard as I do now, but I’m afraid the focus will be on my not working.
Maria: Whoa, Dave! We need to address possible negatives, but not all at once – and not first. Let’s stick with the process. It doesn’t start with all the challenges. The first two questions focus on how your changed way of working can benefit the company. First and foremost, they’re looking for a positive business impact. Can you hold the negatives for a little bit?
David: It’s hard not to get hung up there, but I’ll follow your lead.
Maria: Good. Consider me your personal GPS. And your first instruction is “go to Question 1 on the form.” (Dave pulls the form up on his screen.)
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CORPORATE VIDEO SCRIPT REVISED BY ROBERT MONTGOMERY:
[David in a conference room, with a blank legal pad, struggling with the proposal form. He sees Maria passing.]
David: Maria! Hi.
Maria: [coming in] Hey, David.
David: I thought you worked from home on Wednesdays.
Maria: Usually, but not today. In for a big meeting. How are you?
David: I’m fried. I’m working on this flex proposal. I need to telecommute like you do.
Marie: Oh, right – you have that monster commute.
David: It just seems so much saner for me to telecommute a few days. But I’m having trouble getting started on this.
Marie: I have time if you want some help.
David: Yes! Thank you.
Maria: What helped me the most is keeping my focus on the form. Read it carefully and think hard and creatively about the questions. Don’t give up until you find winning answers.
David: By winning, you mean the company and the customers win.
Maria: And you.
David: I’d win if I could telecommute just two days a week. I’d still work full time, but wipe out almost half my commute. It’d be great for me – but what about the company? That’s where I keep getting stuck. “Good for me, bad for the business.”
I keep seeing my frustrated manager and coworkers stopping at my empty desk, wondering where I am. I know I’ll still work as hard as I do now, but I’m afraid they’ll think I’m not working because I’m not “at work.”
A well-written video script is well worth its weight in words!
Maria: Whoa, Dave! We need to address possible negatives, but not all at once – and not first. Stick with the proposal form. The first two questions focus on how your telecommuting can benefit the company. First and foremost, they’re looking for a positive business impact. Can you hold the negatives for a little bit?
David: It’s hard not to get hung up there, but I’ll follow your lead.
Maria: Good. Consider me your personal GPS. And your first instruction is “go to Question 1 on the form.” (Dave pulls the form up on his screen and reads it aloud:)
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To get in touch with Robert for a free consult: contact.